“She couldn’t feel her wings but knew they were there so she built a ladder that led to the sky and when she touched the clouds she remembered how to fly.”
Valentines Day! What better day to talk about love, SELF-LOVE.
So I ask you, when you look in the mirror what do you see? And I’m NOT talking vanity my friends.
Are you honest with yourself?
Are you proud of what you see?
Are you honest with those around you? Partners, Co-Workers, Friends & Family?
Do you care too much what others think of you?
If so what are you willing to do about it?
Definition of reflection
1: an instance of reflecting especially: the return of light or sound waves from a surface
2: the production of an image by or as if by a mirror
3: a thought, idea, or opinion formed or a remark made as a result of meditation
I want you to look in that mirror. Besides writing in my journal every day (yes every day) I want to share a technique that works for me when any of the above apply. I don’t remember who gave me the advice to sit in front of a mirror and have a conversation with myself, but I cannot tell you how impactful it has been, still is for me. If you’re ready to move an inch today into self-care and self-love this is how I started, and still use when Ms. Doubt is trying to hijack my day. I hope it works for you as well.
Find a quiet place, start somewhere in your home if possible. If not the drivers seat of your car works! You simply need a mirror and a little quiet.
When you are feeling ANY kind of negativity, questioning yourself or feeling anxious I want you to try this. Sit down on the floor, legs crossed, hands gently resting on your lap and to stare at yourself. STARE into your eyes. Oh and don’t forget to BREATHE, breathe deeply, all the way to your belly. Try and identify the negative thought you are having or pick an emotion that is making you uncomfortable. I want you to speak to yourself out loud, yes out loud.
I will use myself and a recent example:
I spent over a year putting this blog together. Truth be told I could have gone “live” with Chasing Alison six months ago had I had the confidence. I had written that first post in June of 2020. The night I promised myself that I finally would, Feb 2, 2021, I was pacing my home office. I probably made a path in the hardwood. But then I remembered AW and I had just bought a new mirror to hang in here. I pulled it out of the packaging and leaned it against the wall. Then I sat.
It probably took a full 3-5 minutes before I spoke. I let myself cry first. I let myself feel it all. Then I spoke, ‘This is for you. This is for even one person. Use your voice. What others think is irrelevant. You are strong. You have survived. You can handle the backlash. You no longer live in shame and humiliation. Find your damn courage Alison, push the publish button.’ I eventually got up off of the floor, walked over to my computer and pushed that button.
The SMALLEST first steps to wellness are the hardest. Why? Because it DOES REQUIRE you to look in the mirror and be true to yourself. And that is difficult. To own our messes is so critical and I recognize how much courage that takes. But it’s so freeing when you do. So look in that mirror, have that conversation with yourself. Whether it’s about your relationships, your job, your kids, your decisions, all of the above, you are worth it.
I had the intention of telling a story of the first time I tried this, but that moment deserves its own stage. What I can say is I have had moments of feeling completely out of my body, and what I now recognize as full blown panic attacks. This worked for me three years ago, clearly still does. Again, I really hope it works for you.
My Sunday wish for you is to move an inch, just an inch toward your wellness. We all know inside what we need to work on, what needs adapting, what needs a push or a nudge to growth, to self-love. Baby steps my friends. Or as I like to do often, pack a bag, take a walk and breathe.